Lost in Thoughts

My day got mixed up (again). I cannot set the priorities right (again). All my deadlines were missed (again). I don’t know what to do anymore (and it kept repeating).

And there she goes again, checking out unnecessary things on the internet. Things that will be tossed aside when it’s unwrapped.

Juggling things, when will it end?

Headache, when will it stop?

My worry, when will it disappear?

What a Time to be Alive

This year, I celebrated Eid in confusion. I bet many of you felt the same. In times when economic and political tension was at stake, I was forced to feel joy. Unable to breathe, I need to meet people with smiley faces. Despite all the warm feelings inside of me, I also feel rage and despair. I didn’t know how to react; I didn’t have the time to process all those feelings. So, I bundled it up. Keeping it aside for a while.

I don’t know about you, but I feel guilty to be able to have spare money to buy new books. To be able to cook meat and other proteins. I feel guilt because I was able to enjoy comfort while others lost their income due to the unstable economy.

The laws are bent, the policymakers are held hostage, and the government is silent. They said everything is alright. The sun is shining like it is supposed to be.

In other lands, the Palestinians lost their home, their organs, and their loved ones. What could I do in order to stop all the atrocity and the injustice? I keep asking the same question and pray for an answer. Until now, I’ve never found one.

What I can do is get up every day. Doing my best, juggling things, and writing some useless lines of words. Hoping that someday, it will light up someone else’s lines of words. Maybe yours.

May we always have hope and help each other.

Konsumsi Tak Berkesudahan

Aku ingin sekali menulis ini sejak lama, tapi aku selalu merasa tidak punya kapasitas untuk bicara banyak karena tidak punya background atau pengetahuan yang luas tentang ini. But, it’s been boiling in my head and I cannot seem to let it go. So, let’s write it.

Kalau ada satu hal yang sangat teringat dari buku The Vegetarian yang ditulis Han Kang, buatku salah satunya adalah tentang over-consumption atau konsumsi berlebih. Di mana manusia sepertinya tidak pernah berhenti dipaksa untuk mengonsumsi berbagai macam hal. Dikelabui untuk terus membeli dan dibuat berkeinginan untuk terus menerus memiliki sesuatu. Hal ini sepertinya terus didukung dengan tren unboxing, shopping haul, dll.

The other day, I watched someone unbox a make-up box with princess style worth 10 or 20 million titled “my childhood dream”. I stopped in the middle of the video; why should I give such attention to this type of content? What would I feel after watching this? Do I want it too? Should I also make my childhood dream come true of buying something I finally can afford? Do I support this kind of thing? Atau “Ya udahlah, itu kan uang dia juga, ngapain diurusin”? Banyak hal yang berkecamuk di kepalaku tapi pada akhirnya bermuara pada “ya udahlah”.

Read more

Would I Still Write It?

I’m a huge mess, drowning in rose-colored lake.

Searching for meaning.

I thought I’d found one, like everybody else.

In somewhat of an enlightenment and revelation.

Turns out, I’m the firecracker.

Ready to crack, burning in a circle.

I’m a loose cannon.

Causing havoc everywhere I go.

But I dreamt of sunrays and became one.

Giving warmth until I run out of it.

Can I still do that?

Would I believe it?

Produk Ramadan Hariku Studio

Sebenarnya, aku belum pernah menuliskan tentang proses re-branding Kawung Living ke Hariku Studio di sini. Walaupun re-branding-nya sudah dari tahun 2021, tapi mungkin akan kuceritakan di lain waktu. Hari ini aku mau menulis tentang produk-produk yang aku buat untuk Ramadan.

Ramadan itu peak season-nya orang Indonesia dalam perbelanjaan dalam setahun, brand-brand hijab dan fashion bahkan menyiapkan koleksi lebaran itu setahun sebelum. Iya, SETAHUN. Karena memang event Ramadan itu dianggap sangat serius dan potensial.

Untuk yang tertarik baca-baca, ini ada beberapa insight via Think with Google, TikTok, dan Tokopedia.

Read more